Wednesday, July 20, 2011

Tomorrow Never Comes.

Why am I writing this down?
For the public to see, read, judge.
I guess I feel like it makes a difference.
That maybe someone will read
it and know that they're not the only one
that feels this way.

I have the energy.
I'm not tired.
I just don't have the will anymore.
I don't have the will to do the things
I want to do.
I want to do all these wonderful things.
But I don't have the will.
To sign up for classes,
to make art,
to work out,
to go for a bike ride,
to eat better,
to clean my house,
to get out of bed,
even to write this blog.

I went to work for three hours today.
After that I sat and watched nine
hours of Greys Anatomy.
Nine hours.
In that time I managed to clean up
a pile of cat puke,
throw away and expired gallon of
take the polish off my nails,
and plucked my eyebrows.
That is all I accomplished today.

I don't know what's happening to
me, but I need to figured out how to
fix it before my whole life passes
me by.
I'm not posting this on facebook,
but it will be here.
For someone to read if they need to
and if they have the will to find it.

Tuesday, July 12, 2011

Winds of Change.

I know I haven't written in awhile
and I really don't have a good reason
as to why.
It's not like nothing exciting has been happening
because I've had a pretty eventful few weeks.
Maybe it's because I've been so busy.

I wrote a blog back in February
with a similar topic.
There were all these things about my
life I felt I wanted to be different,
and the truth is, we are humans.
There will always be things about
ourselves that we want to change.
Even if we accomplish the things we want to
now, there will always be something else
we'll want to do later.

I still wish I knew how to play the guitar.
I still wish I would pick up yoga again.
I wish I could be more active and better to
my body.

One day I'm sure I'll be able to accomplish
my small goals in life, but I'm taking
it one goal at a time.
life changing event number one,
I enrolled in Tri C to take some personal
enrichment art classes.
Drawing 1
Painting 1
Sculpture 1
Ceramics 1

These are the classes I need to
brush the cobwebs off my rusty art hands
and make a portfolio worthy to
apply to Cleveland Institute of Art
in fall of 2012.
If all goes well, in 5 years I
will be a fully qualified art teacher.

June has four blog entry and so
many things have happened since then.
Baby's, weddings, birthdays, concerts.
Here are some of my favorite moments
of the past couple months
you missed...

It's been great everyone.


Something I learned this month:
How to properly make...

Oreo Truffles

(You would think being a photographer, this picture
would look better...)

1 Package of Double stuffed Oreos
1 Package Philadelphia cream cheese
1 Package dipping milk chocolate
1/2 Cup of white chocolate

Crush the cookies into fine crumbs using
a food processor, NOT a blender.
If you don't have a food processor
put them in a bag and rolling pin them.
Mix cream cheese and cookie crumbs in
a large bowl until well blended
and roll them into balls.
Place them on cookie sheet and put them
in the freezer until hard.
Meanwhile melt chocolate using the double
boil method.
Once balls are firm
(minds out of the gutter people)
coat them in chocolate and place them back
on cookie sheet.
Once the chocolate is dry melt white
chocolate and pour it into small sandwich
Cut the bags corner and make desired
design on top of truffle.
Best served chilled.
They are quite delicious so you should
make them.

Friday, July 1, 2011

I Am Flawed.

I'm a bad speller.
Sometimes I cry for no reason.
I offend people without meaning to.
I get scared when I'm home alone.
I love my cat more than most people.
I like my house to be clean.
I am picky when it comes to relationships.
I have more shoes in my closet
than food in my fridge.
I procrastinate.
I daydream all day long.
I can be vain.
I shop more than I should.
I don't have many friends.
I don't drink pop.
I can't burp.
It takes me three sips to finish a shot.
I hate making decisions.
I have a thing for owls.
I've seen every episode of FRIENDS
a ridiculous amount of times.
I hold in things that bother me.
I'm out of shape.
I can be distant.
I go to sleep early.
I play childish video games.
I pay my bills on time.
I never return movies on time.
I'm afraid of zombies.
I'm afraid to leave my comfort zone.
I eat very fast.
I like to cook and bake but I
rarely do it right.
I take three hours to do an hour of work.
My face gets red when I'm nervous.
I avoid confrontation.
I can be mean.
I like to play sports even though
I'm not very good.
I throw everything away.
I can be selfish.
I give people too many chances.
I am glass half empty.
I am glass half full.
I stand up for people I love but not
for myself.
I am girly.
I swear all the time.
I jump to conclusions.
I don't like to share.
I contradict myself.
I make jokes that aren't funny,
but I laugh anyway.

I am not easy to love.
Thank you to those of you who try.